angstygoblin (angstygoblin) wrote,
angstygoblin
angstygoblin

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USURP

v. tr.
To seize and hold (the power or rights of another, for example) by force and without legal authority. See Synonyms at appropriate.
To take over or occupy without right: usurp a neighbor's land.

Today I won a battle, at a grim, grim cost.
As I stepped into the shower intending to wash the grime and dust off of my body
the grime that accumulates throughout the hard day's (single) course of Antropology
As I stepped towards the washtub, my shadow loomed over the enemy. Blattidae.
A cockroach.

I must've seemed cyclopean to the miniscule terror for no sooner did my shadow loom over him than he started shaking his limbs and anttenae in fear or fury (which I will never be certain). Daunted by the prospect of picking up so fierce a warrior I did what any red-blooded american warrior would've done in the face of adversity, I looked for chemical weaponry. And found it, in the form of "The Works" bathroom sanitizer. I gave the beast a stab of soapy vengeance, he took a ball of sudsy doom in the face it did nothing but sap the strength to wriggle out of his wee little body. Realizing that such a magnificent (if not DISGUSTING) soldier cannot simply be burned, smashed, and flushed, I flooded the tub, and sent him spiraling to the afterlife in as much a kingly fashion as I could. Then I filled the bathub with cleaner and realised that though I had won the battle, dare say the war, I had been robbed of the thing that I had originally sought out. Precious cleanliness.

Damn you cockroaches!
Damn you all the HELL! (or, ya know... the sewer.)
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